This is one of those times I feel compelled/led to share one of my past writings. Written several years ago, it showed up in my fb memories. Often times I click the memory and it says the link is unavailable. Today, I said, Lord, if you want it shared the link will open. Well… So here it is. Read or not, it’s up to you. Comment or not. Just let it fill your spirit. I need to read it again myself. God bless.
“And He went a little beyond them, and fell on His face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will.” Matthew 26:39
Last year during Lent, I wrote the following post. I have edited and updated it.
There are times in our lives when we are in need of physical healing, and yet must endure suffering for our spiritual health. The healing we so desire would impede our spiritual progress. Such situations often present themselves when we want what we want, yet God has a different plan. I call these situations the battle of wills … the physical will versus the spiritual will.
As an example I will share from my personal experience. Over the past couple of years I have had some health issues that have put me to the test. While, not life threatening, they have been physically uncomfortable, at times worrying, and just plain no fun! I have prayed continually for acceptance and compliance to God’s will, and just when I would think I was almost there, I would undergo more tests to check for some new resulting condition. It was at these times I found myself drained and fighting that battle between physical and spiritual will.
I have learned through much prayer, reflection, and time spent in stillness before God, that I am not, and never will be, in control of my life. I have learned that the only thing in my control is my reaction to, and my attitude toward God’s will for me.
To further illustrate this battle of wills I am also sharing part of an entry from “Journey Through The Stillness,” my personal spiritual journal. This particular entry was written the day before one such doctor appointment.
March 21, 2011 – Today’s Stillness is more in my Spiritual Communion … In my offering I pray: “Lord, you know my heart and mind. Physically I want to be healed. I want to have my eyes back from this disease. I want to lose the weight the medicine has helped me to put on. I want the pressures in my head to cease. Physically I ask to be healed. Spiritually, Lord, my soul knows there is a bigger picture, a larger plan, of which You are in total control. Spiritually, I pray, Lord, only You know the plans You have made for me. I trust in your plan. I trust in your will for my life completely. Physically my being cries out heal me; Spiritually my soul cries out save me. Let it be according to your will.” When I enter into The Stillness, He lets me know this is what He wants from me. He wants complete surrender to Him.
Surrender is tough, but truly not as tough as that battle between physical and spiritual will. That battle keeps one’s soul in turmoil, while surrender brings quiet peace. Surrender brings hope in the knowledge that we are in His loving Hands. In that peace of knowing is the strength to pray, “Let it be according to your will; not mine.” In that surrender the battle is won by the spiritual will. In that surrender we are saved.
The personal experiences I share are never to call attention to myself, but to hopefully help others who may be going through similar or even worse battles and struggles. Lent is the perfect time to surrender all to Him who loves us. God bless.