Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

Posted on February 19, 2011 by Martha

“For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face.  Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”  1 Corinthians 13:11-13

     It seems of late that I have been struggling a bit with myself.  Over the past year I have gone through many changes; some on a personal level, others on a spiritual level.  If you know me, then you are well aware of the spiritual journey I have been on since the start of 2010 when I first entered into The Stillness.  If you know me personally, you also know that I have had some health issues.  While the health issues are not extremely serious, one issue has concerned my eyes.  After having a radiation ablation of my thyroid I have been dealing with thyroid eye disease.  At times, with the pressure and swelling, I am not a happy camper!

     At one such point, I shared with my husband that when I look into the mirror I no longer see me.  While he was very kind and comforting, I know he didn’t understand fully what I meant.  Yes, I am growing older, and I know aging changes us physically and mentally.  No, I am not overly concerned with that; and no, I don’t have one foot in the grave already!  I love my life and am looking forward to the rest of it!

Even so, when I look in the mirror through the pressure of swollen eyes, I definitely don’t see the me I want to see.  The same is also true when I look in the mirror through a soul swollen and stained with sin.  I definitely don’t see the me I want to see then either.  In that mirror is a reflection of my image, the way I see myself.  It may or may not be the way others see me.  It is not the way Jesus sees me.

When Jesus sees me in the mirror He sees Himself.  I am a reflection of Him; I am created in His image and likeness.  The key is to learn to see Jesus when I look into the mirror myself.  Easier said than done.

In one of the very first “Journey Through The Stillness” entries (January 12, 2010), Jesus says, “Get to know Me, my beloved.  Try to think and act like Me … Try to BE Me.”  Then again (January 19, 2010), He says, “Just BE!  Just BE Martha!  Remember, you are IN Me, and I am IN you.  Let your joy out everywhere. How can I help but shine through!”  Actually, He presents a similar theme in various ways many times throughout the course of my journey.

Jesus wants each one of us to be whole.  And, we feel whole only when we feel Him within.  To feel Jesus within, one must spend time with Him, in His Word, getting to know Him.  The more you know Him, the more you want to know Him, and the more you become like Him.  When you become like Him, you will see Him in your mirror.  When you see Jesus in your mirror, you will see the you that you want to see.

Pray: Jesus, help me to be person you want me to be, that I may be a reflection of your glory.  Amen.

“God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”  Genesis 1:27

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Which Sheep Are You?

Posted on February 4, 2011 by Martha

“Then Jesus told them this parable:  Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them.  Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it?  And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home.”  Luke 15:3-6

     Do not get me started on sheep, because I absolutely love them!  I can totally relate to sheep.  One of my most favorite images of Our Lord is Jesus, The Shepherd.  In fact, I will go so far as to say I have a personal relationship with Jesus and three of His sheep.  I have names for them!  Two of them I endearingly call “The Lost But Found” and “The Lover Of Life.”

     Because of my love for all animals, throughout my “Journey Through The Stillness” (my personal spiritual journal shared publicly on Facebook), Jesus has used them to get my attention, and to guide and instruct me.  One time, (Stillness entries of July 1 & 2, 2010)  I was looking at my figurine of Jesus The Shepherd and three sheep, and was longing to be the sheep held in His arms.  And I told Him so!  He let me know, in no uncertain terms, that this particular sheep had been tested in the fire.  He said, “It was lost and now needs all the love and reassurance I can give it.”  Then He asked me if I wouldn’t rather be the sheep at His feet, basking in His Love.  He said, “Which is it you desire; to be tested, lost, and found, or to be secure in the fold?”

     I have to admit, I was not prepared to answer that question.  I have always prayed to never be separated from Him, and yet, the thought of ‘being found’ stuck with me.  How wonderful it could be to be found!  Even the next day, when I entered into The Stillness, I was not ready to answer the question.  In reality, by this time, I was exhausted from pondering it within me.  It was not the being tested and being found that disturbed me.  It was the being ‘lost‘, separated from Our Lord.  I kept thinking, “What if I can’t get back to Him?  What if I can’t be found? 

     I am terrified of being apart from Him because He is my every hope, my guide, my solace.  In the end, it was in my exhaustion that I found my answer to the question.  I finally surrendered completely to Him saying, “Do with me as thou will.”  At once there was relief, for now it was out of my control.  I find I no longer desire control.  Everything is better when He is in control.

     By the way, if you are wondering about the third sheep, I lovingly call him, “The Defender.”  But, that is a whole different post for another time!  (Also, my “Journey Through The Stillness” can be accessed on Facebook through this post’s page at the right.)

     Let us pray the 23d Psalm:  The LORD is My Shepherd

The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want.  He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters.  He restores my soul;  He guides me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.  Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff they comfort me.  You prepare a table for me in the presence of my enemies;  You have anointed my head with oil;  my cup overflows.  Surely goodness and lovingkindness shall follow me all the days of my life;  And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

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Get Your Rejuvenation Code Here

Posted on February 2, 2011 by Martha

 “If you are pleased with me, teach me your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with you.  Remember that this nation is your people.”  The LORD replied, “My Presence will go with you, and will give you rest.”  Exodus 33:13-14

     Looking for a pick me up?  Needing rejuvenation?  Wanting to feel refreshed?

     Don’t you sometimes wish you could just click on a ‘refresh’ button, like the one on your computer?  Imagine it.  There would be a moment of blankness, of silence, while everything resets itself.  And then, VOILA!  You are brand new, all components working, all systems go!

     While we may not have a ‘refresh’ button, each one of us does have a reset mode.  To get into this mode you need the access code.  Once you implement the code, you will be in your own private break area, your own private lounge.  Sounds great doesn’t it?  You are saying, “Give me the code, already!”  It is actually quite simple.  It is PPPP. 

     Four Ps; that’s it, your personal access code to a mini-retreat!  It is called a ‘Jesus Binge’, and you can adapt it to fit your own time, and your own needs.  Now that you have the code, lets learn what it means and how to use it.  The four Ps stand for Plan, Prepare, Pray, and Participate.  It may sound like a lot of work, but it is actually quite simple.  And you know me, I like simple!

     First you must plan a time, and a place.  For deeper renewal plan for a longer Jesus Binge, maybe a morning or at least a couple of hours.  For a quick refresher plan a shorter period, such as an hour, or even fifteen minutes of you break time!  It is completely adaptable to your needs.  Find a place where you can be away from distractions.  If there is not a place at work, go out to your car, or to a park.  At home?  Plan to ‘Binge’ while the kids are napping.  Sit on the edge of the tub and close the bathroom door if you have to.  Better yet, soak in the tub!  Just find some time and a place where you can be alone and free from distractions.

     Second, you must prepare.  The drop down menu of the reset button is Jesus, everything Jesus.  Do you have a favorite Gospel, prayer, or song about Jesus?  If so, gather them all up, and have them ready – in the car, by the tub, etc.  If you have no favorites, then have your Bible at hand.  You could be on retreat for a lifetime with Jesus and just the Bible!  Beforehand, look through it and bookmark some passages that speak mainly of Jesus, of His love and His healing ministry.

     We have a time planned, a place prepared, and now we pray.  Yes, before the planned event, share with God your need for rejuvenation, and ask Him to guide you in your time apart with His Son.  Ask Him to open your heart and fill it with Jesus.

     And last, you participate.  It is time!  The day and time arrive.  If you have planned well, you have a place to go, readings and prayers to meditate on, and a heart open to rejuvenation.  Stand, sit, kneel, whatever!  Just be with Jesus.  Pray, read, meditate, and then be SILENT WITH JESUS.  He will speak to your heart in ways that fill it with love, peace, and joy.  He will refresh you, just as if you had clicked on the ‘refresh’ button!  There will be that moment of blankness, that moment of silence, and then, voila!  You will be made brand new, all components working, all systems go!

     Get ready!  Go on a Jesus Binge.

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Mundane to Majesty

Posted on January 31, 2011 by Martha

“Now no one can look at the sun, bright as it is in the skies after the wind has swept them clean.  Out of the north he comes in golden splendor; God comes in awesome majesty.”  Job 37:21-22

Are you in a rut?  We all get in a rut at times.  Sometimes life seems to find a status quo where nothing exciting is happening.  We might head to work every day singing ‘Ho hum, Ho hum, off to work in glum!  We wonder where is the, “Hi ho, Hi ho, off to work we go!”  Where is the glam?

We do the things we do, in the order we do them, because they must be done.  We have bills to pay, and people to care for.  If we let it, it can drag us down the path of a lackluster almost non-existence, one where nobody notices us anymore.  We just are.

What if we could get out of our rut, without changing our course?  What if we could change from mundane to majesty?  In order to do so, we must totally change our focus.  Do you focus on what is wrong, or what is right in your life?  Maybe you have a job you don’t particularly like.  Try out this thought process.  Do you have a car that takes to you to that ho hum job?  Does that ho hum job put food on your table, a roof over your head, and let you take care of all those you love?  We just changed our focus from the boring routine to one of provision and love!

It is not always easy to look on the bright side, and some situations are such that we can’t find any bright side.  If such is the case, then we must look around the situation, outside the situation, or above the situation.  When we look around it, do we see others supporting and loving us through it?  When we look outside of it, do we see the beauty of our earth and the magnificence of our Creator, letting it soothe our soul?  When we look above it, do we see God, who lovingly cares about us and wants us to be whole again?

I have often said that God smiles at me.  He does!  I believe He knows what will make me smile, and looks for ways to do so.  I believe He lovingly looks for, and excitedly waits for, opportunities to make His presence known to me in a way that brings me joy.  In “Journey Through The Stillness”, my personal spiritual journal, I have related times when He unmistakably interrupted, or interceded into, a situation where I was in stress.  At times it has been with a certain song on the radio at just the right moment.  Once, it was an alligator crossing the road right in front of my car during the wee hours of the morning, while on my way home from the emergency room.  Another time, it was an Eagle atop a telephone pole.  I stopped my car and stared up at him through my sun roof.  It was as if God was staring down at me, and I was staring up at Him!  I could go on, and if I did, you might just decide I am crazy instead of spirit filled!  All I can say is that I believe God sends me smiles.  I look for them and I appreciate them.  And, I let Him know this.

Look for what God sends you.  Think of what you like, what brings you joy, and then pay attention.  I am sure you will find Him there waiting to smile upon you!  When He does, you will have gone from mundane to majesty!

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Eavesdroppers

Posted on January 26, 2011 by Martha

“Meanwhile a crowd of thousands had gathered, so dense they were treading on one another.  He began to speak first to His disciples: Be on guard against the yeast of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy.”  Luke 12:1 

     I love reading in a special Bible I have by Max Lucado.  It is called “The Inspirational Bible, New Century Version.”  It is more like a study Bible or a devotional Bible.  It is unique in that he includes what are called Life Lessons, which contain a Situation, Observation, Inspiration, Application, and Exploration.  The Situation is a short synopsis of the context of the chapter; the Observation provides a truth or lesson to be gained; the Inspiration provides excerpts from Christian authors on the main point; the Application provides stimulus to use in our everyday life; and the Exploration shares other scripture or verses related for further study.  Mostly I just read and enjoy!

     In Luke, Chapter 12, we see many instances of Jesus preaching to crowds of thousands, and to His disciples.  One time Peter asks, “Lord, did you tell this story to us or to all people?” (Luke 12:41)  Jesus had just warned, “Be dressed, ready for service, and have your lamps shining.  Be like servants who are waiting for their master to come home from a wedding party.” (Luke 12:35-36)  Max Lucado recaps this in the Situation section in this way, “Thousands of people gathered around Jesus.  Yet he spoke to his disciples, letting the crowd overhear.”

     As readers of the Bible, listeners to the Word, we are part of the crowd.  We overhear what Jesus was saying to His disciples over two thousand years ago!  As amazing as that seems, I would like to go a step further.  Think about the idea that, not only are you an eavesdropper in the crowd, but after hearing the Word, you become the Word.  Our life, our actions, our words serve as witness to what Jesus said two thousand years ago.  Now, the crowd is thronging around us, listening to us!  Let the crowd overhear!

     This goes along with a saying I am sure most of you have heard, “you may be the only Bible some people ever read.”  It is awe inspiring to know that the Word of God is Eternal.  It has no beginning and no end.  It is as alive today as it was two thousand years ago when Jesus walked the earth.  It is alive in each one of us.  We hear, we believe, we become, we witness!  And all the while, there are eavesdroppers in the crowd.  Live your life, your faith, as if you know they are eavesdropping.  Let the crowd overhear!

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Leave Room For The Angels

Posted on January 25, 2011 by Martha

“The human mind may devise many plans, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will be established.”  Proverbs 19:21

     We plan, we calculate, we scheme.  We know exactly how things are going to go, or at least how they are supposed to go.  Then we jump in headfirst only to meet every obstacle possible.  Nothing works right, nothing goes as planned.

     Thwarted plans equals frustration in my book.  There have been many times when I set out at the beginning of the day with a ‘to do’ list to be accomplished.  I may get some of it done, I may get none of it done.  Later, I realize that the things I did accomplish were the the important things, and maybe not on the ‘to do’ list at all.  Maybe I received a phone call from a friend in need; maybe I noticed something else needing to be taken care of that I hadn’t thought of before the day began; maybe the car wouldn’t start when I went out in the garage to leave!  Whatever the circumstances were, whatever caused me to divert my attention to other matters, my best laid plans were thwarted.  I especially hate the one where the car doesn’t start!

     The real deal is that we made one set of plans, but God had another set of plans!  As the proverb quoted above says, “but it is the purpose of the Lord that will be established.”   His purpose may be to protect us from harm, to save us from unnecessary work, or to serve a need of someone else.   For example, not too long ago, I had a major issue with my car.  If I had handled it my way, I would have been on Interstate 4, on my way to the dealership, when the entire engine completely shut down.  Instead, He led me to switch my plans, which enabled me to make it to my own driveway, where it died as I was pulling in!  I was able to have it towed.   When I realized what had transpired to make things happen in this way, I thanked God for thwarting my own plans.

     When my children were younger, and still living at home, before they left for the day, I would tell them to make sure to ‘leave room for the Angels’, especially as teenagers driving.  If we want God’s Angels to take care of  and protect us, we need to give them the space to do it!  We need to pay attention when we get an urge or feel the need to divert from or change our initial plans.  When we make our plans, we need to remember to consult Him.  And, when our plans go awry, we need to remember there may be a very good reason for it.

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But For The Grace Of God

Posted on January 24, 2011 by Martha

“Thus says the Lord, ‘The people who survived the sword Found grace in the wilderness.”  Jeremiah 31:2

     Your life has been turned upside down, you have been thrown in the fire, tested beyond your endurance … or so you thought.  In actuality you have been living in grace, the grace of change, the grace of God.  It certainly didn’t feel like grace at the time.  In fact, it felt like anything but.  After the fact, I have often said that God dragged me, kicking and screaming, to a better place in my life.

     Sometimes we are absolutely positive we are on the right track.  Things are going along just fine; we know we are doing the right thing.  Then, something happens.  Everything changes.  What we knew to be, is no more.  Whether we are faced with changes in jobs, homes, or even friends, we are not happy campers.  More than likely we are unhappy because the change was unexpected, not something we planned, and not something we wanted.

     Unwelcome, unplanned change is never easy.  And we tend to fight it, which makes it even harder.  If we knew ahead of time, we could at least choose to go with the flow, or make the best of it.  When it hits like a ton of bricks, the first thing we do is duck and cover, or run headlong into it, or maybe even run in the opposite direction.  We don’t have time to analyze because we are too busy being shoved down the path!

     With the luxury of hindsight, we often find that everything worked out in the end to our good.  Maybe the job change resulted in a better job, or at least one we like better.  Maybe the home change brought us to a new place with a chance to start a new life.  Maybe we needed new friends who would accept and appreciate us for who we are.  Slowly but surely, we begin to realize, that all along, we were being pulled by the Grace of God to that better place.

     I will use as an example one of the times in my life when God did pull me in Grace, literally kicking and screaming.  I thought I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing.  At the time I had been teaching art for ten years in a Catholic school.  I loved it.  How could teaching, and sharing Him with His flock, in a school of my faith not be where He wanted me to be?  I was sure I would be there for a long time to come.  However, He had other plans for me.  And, He knew I would not just walk away; something would have to happen.  Knowing that I was not going to be fired, He would somehow have to make me want to leave.  It wasn’t easy for Him, and it wasn’t easy on me.  He decided to make me good and angry so I would want to leave.  It was a process that had to develop over time.  Did I mention He dragged me kicking and screaming to a better place in my life?  Everything changed for me.  I was very unhappy about it, and I dwelt in the pain and confusion of it for quite some time.  After awhile I began to see, in my new situation, that I now had the ability to be there for my family, for my children, in ways I would not have been able to, except by the Grace of God!

     The next time change rears its head in an unexpected way in your life, try to step back from it and take a good look at it.  It just may be the Grace of God at work in your life.  And remember, Happy are those who recognize the Grace of change!  Sometimes it takes a little distance down the road though!  Then we can truly say, but, for the Grace of God.

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Do You Have A Builder’s Permit?

Posted on January 22, 2011 by Martha

“So David lived in the strong, walled city and called it the City of David.  David built more buildings around it, beginning where the land was filled in.  He also built more buildings inside the city.  He became stronger and stronger, because the Lord God All-Powerful was with him.”

     Oh, to live in the security of a walled city, a fortress.  Oh, to be prospered and protected.  Oh, to know the feeling of strength, to accomplish, to persevere.  Can there truly be such an existence?

     The answer is yes; with God, all things are possible.  In 1 and 2 Samuel,  we read about David.  As long as he follows God’s will, as long as he is fulfilling God’s plan for his life, he perseveres, he prospers.  Is it without adversity?  No.  One only has to read a little of his life’s story to see it was filled with struggles and adversities such as war, murder, and infidelity.  And yet, David became King, and from the house of David came our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

     We struggle in our everyday lives to be the person God wants us to be.  Many of us fail over and over again.  Many turn and walk away, doomed to lives filled with turmoil and misery.  In reality, it is us who must build our stronghold, our walled city.  We build it brick by brick, prayer by prayer, one faith-filled act at a time.

     To build our stronghold we must begin within ourselves, by seeking God’s plan for our life.  We do this by spending time in silence before Him.  When we realize our own wall of strength and protection, we begin to build one around our loved ones.  We do this by praying for their faith and for their protection.  We also witness our own faith to them.  As we build, we grow ever stronger, able to withstand the attacks from the outside.  As we build, our fortress expands to encompass ourselves, our loved ones, and others around us who witness and immitate our strength and faith.

     Do the attacks keep coming?  Yes, and probably even more so than before, because now, like David, you are with the Lord God All-Powerful.  Just as David did, you may falter along the way.  But, because you are God’s, your fortress will prove strong.  The evil one’s battering ram is fiercely strong also, but not against the Lord God All-Powerful.

     Oh, to live in the walled city of God, to be heir to His throne, to be safe within the care of the Lord God All-Powerful.  Get your builder’s permit today.  Spend time in His silence before Him.

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El Roi, The God Who Sees

Posted on January 21, 2011 by Martha

 “Where can I go from your spirit?  from your presence where can I flee?  If  I go up to the heavens, your are there; if I sink to the nether world, you are present there. ”  Psalm 139:-8

     All of us carry around hurt within our heart.  It may be from long ago, or not quite so long ago.  We may have forgiven and tried to forget; we may have filed it away and tried to live our life as if it never occurred.  Most of us have the ability to put our hurts behind us and move on.  It doesn’t mean the hurt didn’t happen, or it is totally forgotten.  It just means we choose to live outside of it.

     Years ago God led me to a beautiful book entitled, “Lord, I Want To Know You, by Christian author, Kay Arthur.  It is a study of the different names of the Lord.  As Kay puts it, “… so that you will know where to run to find help in time of need.”  The book highlights the Old Testament Names of God, explaining the meaning of, and giving examples of how they can be used in our everyday lives.  It has had a profound effect on me. To this day, I call upon our Lord using many of the names I learned.  I find it very comforting.

     The name which helps tremendously when dealing with hurt in our lives is El Roi, The God Who Sees.  When we choose to move beyond our hurts, we often do so without being truly healed.  Something often comes up bringing it to the forefront of our memory.  We relive it in our minds and hearts, and then try to move beyond it again.  The cycle repeats itself leaving us bewildered and very much alone in our hurt.

     Kay Arthur uses the example of Hagar in the Bible.  Hagar was the servant of Abram and his wife, Sarai.  Because they had no children, Hagar was forced to bear Abram a son, and then suffered the abuse of the jealous, Sarai.  When Hagar wanted to run, God instructed her to return into the abuse, and name her son, Ishmael.  He promised Hagar that her descendants would be too many to count; Ishmael would lead a great nation!

     God asked much of Hagar, for the abuse was not going to stop.  She would return to it, live through it, and prosper from it.  God had seen all that happened to her, and He would continue to see.  As hard as it is to fathom, God would allow the abuse in order to bring about the ultimate good in her life and the lives of others involved.  Just like Hagar, we see people today who suffer through all kinds of hurt, mistreatment, and abuse.  It comes in many forms: mental, physical, emotional, and many must suffer in total silence.  No one knows; no one can help them.  We ask how God can allow this and how can there ever be true healing from such evil?

     There is no one complete answer.  Like Hagar, we must trust in God’s sovereign plan. Then, the place to run with the pain and hurt is El Roi, The God Who Sees.  As Kay Arthur points out, He saw the sins committed against you and He will vindicate you, if not in this life, then on the day of judgement.  In His sovereign power, if you but trust in Him, He will work out all for your good.  He saw, He loves, and He restores.

     El Roi can also be a source of constant comfort for parents.  Are your teenagers out late?  Has a child run away from home?  Do you have a child away at college, out on there own for the first time?  While you can’t see them, El Roi can.  El Roi sees them every minute of every day.  Call upon El Roi, and take comfort in The God Who Sees watching over them.  Take comfort in knowing He will work all things, even the bad, for the good of those who know and trust Him.  

“…you know when I sit and when I stand; you understand my thoughts from afar.  My journeys and my rest you scrutinize, with all my ways you are familiar.”  Psalm 139:2-3   

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One of The Saddest Things About Sin

Posted on January 20, 2011 by Martha

 “What happens is that I do, not the good I will to do, but the evil I do not intend.  But if I do what is against my will, it is not I who do it, but sin which dwells in me.”   Romans 7:19-20

     If you are like me, you don’t usually go around hurting people you don’t know; at least not intentionally.  If you do, reading this blog post is probably not going to have any effect on you. 

     When we commit sin, we usually hurt someone.  Sometimes it may be only ourselves, but often it is someone else, someone we know.  Whether it is in thought, word, or deed, sin damages our relationships.  One of the saddest things about sin is that it usually hurts someone we love.  The obvious one is Christ, but in addition to Him, when we sin, we often hurt our spouse, our children, other family members, or our friends.  We may be angry with them, or ourselves, and treat them accordingly, by yelling at, fighting with, or criticizing them.  We may gossip about them behind their back, we may withhold kindness from them, or do things on purpose to make their life hard.  We may withhold our love as a way to get back at them for things they have said or done to us.  As justified as we may feel we are, there is no way to take back our sin against them.  The relationship is damaged. 

     When our relationships with our loved ones suffer, we suffer.  Everyone suffers as a result.  Relationships can often be repaired, but only through atonement for our sins.  We can apologize to them for the hurt we caused.  We can also resolve never to do it again, but only through our actions can we make real amends.   The people in our lives love us and will usually be willing to forgive us.  However, while it is truly sad that we hurt those we love, it is even sadder that we usually repeat our offenses toward them again and again.  Basically, because we are not hermits, because we live in relationships with others, there is no way around this dilemma.   We are all sinners, and unless we become perfect, the scenario will continue.

     For the most part, the people in our lives, our family and friends, are there because they choose to be.  We chose them, and they chose us.  As with Christ, we love our family and friends, and don’t wish to hurt them.  They are just easy targets.  They are always there.   Thankfully, they are usually willing to put up with more from us, forgive us more, than someone who doesn’t love us or know us as well.  The best we can do is make, and keep, ourselves aware of our situation, so we don’t fall back into old habits too easily.

     Sin is hurtful to all involved.  It damages important relationships.  While we should want to eradicate sin from all areas of our lives, hopefully, when we realize that we often hurt the ones we love the most, we will work harder at not doing so.  It should make us want to double and triple our efforts!

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